Kategori: Curhat

Email from the Past

3 Komentar

Earlier this week I received an email from a long long time friend from college. He was actually my crush when I was a freshman. I remember just ended a four year relationship from the first BF of mine and felt lonely. Here comes this guy all charming and sweet. And of course he’s good at playing music. But we had major differences at that time, he celebrated Iedul Fitri while Christmas was my belief. He made a move but after several times going out he decided not to continue it saying uncomfy seeing me with a cross on my neck. I was crushed.

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March is Parch

4 Komentar

Small note I made on 8th March.

This is the coincidence I am not happy about. In the month of TB awareness, our family received a shocking news. My cousin who’s 7 mos pregnant lost her battle to this white plague after surviving covid. She’s that friendly person who smiles a lot and really take good care of her fam. My heart aching. We lost two souls.

While I was still mourning from the news, on the same day, one close friend called and decided to end our friendship due to personal reason. I was shock but I didn’t resist what the universe throws at me. I just surrender to the flow of life and choose to be at peace.

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Here’s a Confession

8 Komentar

I feel like the universe has been trying to redirect me in the first quarter of 2021. It has been energy and mentally draining process. Yet, I cannot grateful enough! I like the version of me now.

It is also actually a reminder of what I should be doing. But again as The Worrier never left my side of the brain, I resort to what I consider as a comfort zone.

Therefore to avoid myself ended up in an angry and bitter stage, I wrote personal journals a lot. Like, a lot. That give me chance to reevaluate my thinking. The self-talk afterwards helps me rediscover new insight and perspective of what I trully want and need. The difference is really significant. I am way happier, calmer and grateful.

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Cutting off Toxic People

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I recently cutting off toxic people from my life and surprise surprise… It feels good. After putting on lots of shit for couple of months which cost my mental health, I finally able to distance myself from the person.

Certain people just don’t deserve another chance, say people who’s pushing their wants, forcing connection and keep on crossing the boundaries.

Only when the person’s gone, I was able to feel my whole emotion again. Like this big heavy burden was lifted up. I feel like a human again not a zombie whose soul was being sucked off till the last drop.

Never realize how big the impact is for my inner peace when I started to set up boundaries and get rid of toxicity. It was one of the best decision ever. I am happy.

Period Remedy

Period sucks 😅 They say after you gave birth, period will be just an easy peasy thing… But not! That one moment of the month is still torturing. That mood swing, the cramp, that exhausted feeling, all just so overwhelming. Not to mention becoming so needy, clingy and questioning everything. Gosh, I am just really not myself during this time.

Exercise usually help to reduce all those sympthoms but since I got my muscle torn up, I can’t do anything about it. So here I am trying to function with all the things going on in my body.

However I do have a little remedy to make myself feels better: Baca lebih lanjut →

Elegi untuk Glenn Fredly

10 Komentar

Lagu-lagu Glenn Fredly itu terasa sangat personal buat saya. Albumnya yang berjudul Selamat Pagi Dunia seolah menyuarakan jeritan suara hati sedalam-dalamnya. Bukan cuma satu atau dua lagu tapi satu album tuh rasanya soundtrack hidup GUE BANGET!

Saya jarang sekali menyukai penyanyi atau sebuah band sampai tergila-gila seperti seekor semut menyenangi gula. Alasannya sederhana saja; nggak mau kecewa. Nggak pengen pas lagi ngefans-ngefans-nya eh tahunya idolanya melakukan sesuatu yang bikin BT. Jadi cukup lumrah untuk saya memisahkan antara sebuah karya dan artis yang membuatnya. Baca lebih lanjut →

The New Normal at Home

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Memasuki hari ke-18 self-isolation di rumah karena pandemi Covid 19. Rasanya awut-awutan. Terus terang saya sudah nggak terlalu memperhatikan soal hari lagi. Udah lupa mana hari Senin, Selasa atau Rabu. Kapan akhir pekan atau hari kerja karena semua rasanya sama saat di rumah aja. Hahaha.

Ada banyak banget hal yang berubah di rumah karena virus dari Wuhan yang dulunya sempat populer dengan nama Corona itu. Yah namanya perubahan berarti ada yang mesti disesuaikan dan penyesuain itu butuh waktu serta kerjasama. Ada yang bikin seneng tapi banyak juga yang bikin senewen. Ada yang bikin saya tiba-tiba berada di survival mode, tapi ada yang bikin saya terharu biru.

Jadi, ini yang berubah di rumah karena Corona Virus aka Covid 19. Ditulis sebagai pengingat di masa depan akan saat-saat ini 🙂 Baca lebih lanjut →